Sunday, October 26, 2008

The Winning Hand

We have come to the final showdown, and it's time to show my cards. Krankor and Ignatz have put up a good fight, but I have the Royal Flush hand: Mel Lastman.

The guy did a bang-up job of ensuring that the 2008 Summer Olympics did not go to Toronto, but instead, that classy, peace-loving, exemplary, world-loved town of Beijing.

"What the hell do I want to go to a place like Mombasa? I just see myself in a pot of boiling water with all these natives dancing around me." -- Toronto Mayor Mel Lastman

This really was just the tip of the iceberg in a career of buffoonery. He is missed.


Krankor said...

Hmmm... I gotta say, as great as Rockin' Mel Slurp was, I still think Ralph has the edge.

However, your one-two punch of Chretien-Lastman is probably superior to my McCain-Klein (McCain isn't a major-leaguer, by the standards set here),

El Cerdo Ignatius said...

Hey! I've only yet played one card. Wait until I've played two before declaring yourself the winner, Sporko.

Although topping Chretien's "proof" explanation, backed up by the Greatness of Mel, is going to be nearly impossible.

I can't decide what I liked best about Mel Lastman: the way he sucked up to the thugs who took over Toronto's police union in the 90s, the way he panicked and screamed on a radio call-in show in response to a snowstorm, the telephone call to TD Visa by his wife back in the early 90s, or the fact that he was the bad boy of Bad Boy Furniture - as evidence by his, uh, colouring outside the lines of his marriage with one of the employees there. Oh, and in response to a journalist's request for a statement when he was elected Mayor of Toronto for the first time (following amalgamation), he just grinned at the camera and said, almost in disbelief, "I am the mega mayor!"